Dystopian Technology

The Dark, the Dumb, the Dystopian

I’ve got a friend in low places…

Don’t leave your house without your… friend (The founder raised $2.5 Million and then spent $1.9 Million on the domain for the website.)

This is some Black Mirror level bullshit right here. A device you wear around your neck that is always listening and then texts you via a phone app to “talk” to you. The site says the conversations are end-to-end encrypted but it’s a “take my word for it,” kind of thing. I’m not taking the word of any techie bastard for anything.

Why do all of these techies think the rest of world want the movie Her to be reality? Seriously? It wasn’t even a very good movie. And does society need yet another piece of technology to break the social ties between humans?

The Forever Mouse

Logitech is batting around this idea for a Forever Mouse. A $200 mouse that will also be on a subscription plan because apparently your fucking mouse needs a subscription. You will own nothing and be broke as fuck.

What small dicked exec came up with this grift? Were they just sitting around and Richard the Exec felt it was his time to shine and blurted out, ”How about an expensive mouse that requires a subscription for updates?” Then the rest of the mentally challenged execs thought about it for 2 seconds and then began to celebrate a new revenue stream with high fives, fist bumps, and simulated air fucks. I hate these Corpo assholes.

Recall on the Microsoft Recall.

The lowdown here is that Recall was going to be delivered to Win11 via Update and would be “opt out”. In other words, it would be on by default. Recall takes a snapshot every 5 seconds or so of your desktop as you are working. You can ask recall to locate that cat image you were working on and then Recall will find it in the screenshots and you can manipulate and work with the data in the screenshot.

The screenshots stay on your PC but they are all in a folder that is un-encrypted. Think of law enforcement mistakenly breaking down you door, arresting you, and then going though your Recall to find something, anything, to justify their fuck up. Or think about your employer turning this on and then spying on your every movement and keystroke. This is the shit that makes you nothing but a cog in the wheel.

Microsoft has pulled the release of Recall in Win11… For now. The righteous outrage over the privacy concerns were enough to get the temporary stay. Don’t get too happy. Microsoft spent hundreds of millions here and this shit is coming whether you like it or not. It may be opt in when it arrives but at some point, Microsoft will turn it on. And then you will need to play with RegEdit and get rid of it until they hide it from there.

Point blank… This is why Linux is now my daily driver OS. This privacy infraction from Microsoft is a bridge too far. If you are on Windows now, you are opening yourself up to be willfully spied on.

Sucking on an AI… Toothbrush.

AI toothbrushes are coming. Can you just “feel” my excitement? I’m so thrilled. It’s… It’s… It’s fucking stupid.

Oh God… Tooth Brushing Tips as a Service (TBTaaS).

What’s next? Automatic uploads of metadata from your tooth-brushing history to the toothbrush company so the Dentist or you can subscribe and get (pay) for your statistics and then offer revenue enhanced tutorials onsite (for a small fee… of course)?

Is the meteor coming? Is it en route? When will the nonsense end?